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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24724426">Lambert and spicy food</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/witchofmorena/pseuds/witchofmorena'>witchofmorena</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, Kaer Morhen, M/M, Spicy Food, past jaskier x aiden</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:56:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,500</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24724426</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/witchofmorena/pseuds/witchofmorena</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Geralt brings Jaskier to Kaer Morhen for the first time. Lambert tries to show off and ends up in pain...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aiden/Lambert (The Witcher), Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>100</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Lambert and spicy food</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/merthurlocked/gifts">merthurlocked</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this can also be found on <a href="https://witchofmorena.tumblr.com/post/619931997001973760/merthurlocked-we-talked-about-this-and-i-finally"> my tumblr </a></p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lambert was on a roof in Kear Morhen, relaxing after a long morning of training when he noticed three figures approaching the gates. Two figures, a horse and a man with white hair were familiar, the last one, was unfamiliar so Lambert figured this must be the bard they all heard about from Geralt (the white haired man). He ran to the gates happy to see his brother tho he’d never admit it. </p><p>“Geralt, you bastard!“Lambert screamed in Geralt’s face as he pinned him to the ground, Geralt struggled and the two started wrestling”You’re the last one to arrive, gramps. Aiden, one of cats, and Coën, the last Griffin, are here - I brought kitty and Eskel brought….Coën“ Lambert’s antics brought a smile to older witcher’s face, but when he heard of cat his smile was replaced with a scowl. Geralt didn’t wish to have his bard anywhere near cats.</p><p>“The keep will be full this winter, huh?“They kept wrestling on the snow covered ground. Geralt decided it was enough playing and pinned Lambert to the floor, not letting him get free.”Let us go to the stables and leave Roach there,”Lambert opened him mouth ready to tease his brother” yes she’s also called Roach you little shit,”Lambert smirked” and then we’ll come up to the dining room to say hi before we bath…“Geralt looked at his companion and realized that he’d much rather meet others clean ”Actually, we’ll bath and then meet others. Ask Eskie to warm us a bath, will you puppy?“Lambert huffed at the nickname, but didn’t throw any insults back, merely stood, nodded and went to tell Eskel of Geralt’s request and news of a not-witcher staying with them.</p><p>After the bath, Jaskier was very nervous - how would other wolf witchers like him? Would the other two, not-wolves, like him or hate his guts just cause he was human? And most importantly how would Geralt’s mentor react to him? Considering all his clothes were dirty from road, he borrowed a shirt from Geralt “What better way to show you’re mine?” which Jaskier made blush, he was still unused to Geralt’s casually affectionate comments like that. </p><p>As soon they were in the dining room, Geralt hugged other two wolves - Eskel and his mentor - and the Griffin, Coën Jaskier recalled. He stood awkwardly on the side, unusually shy and not trying to bring attention to himself.</p><p>“Cat”, Geralt’s tone was neutral. Jaskier knew the last witcher, tho he didn’t know he was a cat - the man was just too lovely and full of life, nothing like the stories and rumors portrait cat witchers.”Lambert mentioned he brought you“</p><p>“White wolf!“ The friendly tone of cat’s voice brought a smile to bard’s face,”I wanted to speak with you a few months ago, but I forgot what it was about….I’m Aiden by the way, I don’t think we ever met“ cat had a smile which, Jaskier and all other witchers could see, annoyed Geralt.</p><p>“Call me Geralt, Aiden…“ Geralt finally shook hands with cat after spending a few minutes glaring at him.”Everyone meet Jaskier, my bard“ Jaskier took that as a signal to move and stand next to Geralt, who wrapped an arm around his shoulders making Jaskier blush again. He smiled nervously and waved.”Jask, meet Vesemir“,the witcher who was obviously oldest simply nodded “Eskel” the witcher with terrible scarring on his face smiled, Jaskier thought his smile was gorgeous,”Coën the Griffin“ the seemingly young man with dark skin and sad eyes waved to Jaskier,”and Aiden-“ </p><p>“I know Aiden“, Jaskier interrupted Geralt mid-sentence,”he was the first witcher I ever met, tho I didn’t know it then I do now“ Jaskier flashed cat a teasing smirk,”besides, Geralt, don’t you think it’d be strange if I didn’t remember a lover? Especially a good one?“ Jaskier left out a part that Aiden was one of his first male lovers. Geralt and Lambert both got a little angry, tho Geralt’s anger quickly dissipated when he felt bard snuggling into his side and hugging him back. </p><p>“I remember you as well little bird!“ Aiden had a look of a cat that caught a canary.”This is rather pleasant surprise-“</p><p>“Dinner’s ready, get to table to eat!“ apparently Vesemir wasn’t in the mood to watch everyone piss off Lambert - that pup had such a short fuse. At the table witchers had a specific place each, with the obvious exception of Aiden who sat next to Lambert (it helped calm him down a bit), so bard sat between Geralt and Coën. The food was a little too…bland, so Jaskier took out spices and added them to his food. He offered them to others, it was only polite to do so, and Aiden took one of mildest spices claiming he likes a tiny bit of fire in his food and thanking Jaskier for sharing. </p><p>“I wanna some spice too“, Geralt, Eskel and Vesemir sighed heavily - their bratty puppy would never learn,”the strongest one you have“ yup, he never was gonna learn.</p><p>“Lambert, you can’t<b> eat</b> <em>spicy</em>“ Eskel tried to remind him,”remember what hep-“</p><p>“You’re not my mother Eskel“ Lambert was being stubborn so Eskel left him alone.”Besides, unlike you <em>I </em>can and love to eat spicy”</p><p>“I have some grounded chily peppers…hmmm…AHA! Here they are!“ Jaskier passed spice (much milder then chily, rather it was tiny bit stronger then the one bard gave to Aiden) to Lambert, who put a bit into his food.”Coën?”</p><p>“No, thanks - I and spices don’t mix well“, Coën had a kind smile on his face. Jaskier’s eyes lit up with understanding <em>After all witchers do have heighten senses </em>he thought <em>so of course most spices are just too hot. </em>He remembered an incident with Geralt, when man was too tired and Jask didn’t know he didn’t like spicy so just passed him the same thing he had for dinner and man cried in pain, Jaskier got him milk from kitchen and he rejected food after that, just went straight to sleep.</p><p>“How about sweets-“ Jaskier was cut off by a cry in pain - Lambert took a bite and the food had too much heat, too much spice. Lambert was jumping around with his mouth open and fanning at it with his hands. Eskel got goat milk - Jaskier didn’t see him leave to get it, too immersed in the ruckus Lambert was making over a tiny bit of fairly mild spice - passing it to the stubborn pup in pain. Lambert downed the pitcher of milk quickly, but tears didn’t stop, nor did his tongue, taste buds (if he was honest he’d say his entire mouth) and his throat stop hurting.”Lambert? Are you okay?“ Jaskier was trying so hard to be concerned, but he was far too entertained by Lambert’s reaction.</p><p>“He’s fine” Vesemir said, Geralt, who didn’t look up from his food, Eskel, who joined dinner once again, Coën, who was evidently also amused, all nodded. </p><p>“He just wanted to show off - tho I’m uncertain“, Aiden teased Lambert,”just for whom? For me, in an attempt to flatter me? or for you in an attempt to make me jealous?“ Aiden couldn’t keep the smug smile off his face when Lambert growled at all of them and pushed the food away, not interested in it anymore. The blush on his cheeks was no longer from the spice, but from embarrassment. All witchers seemed happy to tease Lambert, who just insulted them in turn. While they were trading barbs, Jaskier sneaked back to where his stuff were and brought back a pie, wanting to apologize to Lambert. When he put it in front of witchers, Lambert sniffed it, suspicious and wondering if there are some hidden spices inside.</p><p>“Go on, try it“ Jaskier encouraged them “I didn’t put any spices there“ Geralt dug into the food, eating it and moaning in appreciation. Vesemir, Eskel and Coën followed his lead, quickly devouring the pie while Aiden ate much slower, savoring each bite. Eventually, after he downed another pitcher of goat milk and pain fully dissipated, Lambert didn’t join in. He wrapped the piece of pie into a napkin, probably for later. It was raspberry pie - Jaskier picked that one cause it was Geralt’s favourite and was happy to see others enjoying it.”Lambert?”</p><p>“I’ll eat it in the morning“ was the short sulky reply to Jaskier’s question. Jaskier resolved to never hand him any kind of spice ever again since it obviously ruins the man’s appetite and causes him pain….the same couldn’t be said about Aiden and Geralt….who stopped pranking him with spicy food after the third time Vesemir had to deal with a puppy that rejected food for 3 days and made them both train more and wash all dishes for two weeks…after that they made deal that food is off-limits for pranking - all else however? Go right ahead</p>
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